Episode Transcript
Do you sometimes feel like you are just going through the motions in your life? That you just do what needs to be done to keep your life going? Then you might be stuck in survival mode. Stay tuned to find out more and how you can get out of this mode.
Let´s start by describing survival mode. Being in survival mode comes from our need to survive and not to die. Go back a few hundred or thousand years the state of being in survival meant to be chased by a wild animal like a lion. That´s when our stress system gets activated and helps us to fight or flight.
Nowadays, many people are in a constant stress mode and therefore stuck in a survival environment. But we are not chased by lions or other dangerous animals anymore. The problem is that our body and mind are not built to be constantly under stress.
When we are under stress our body creates certain chemicals and stress hormones that are useful in a dangerous situation but can be harmful when we keep having them on an ongoing basis. These reactions in the body can even lead to mental health issues and might end up in burnout, anxiety or depression. But the physical body will show consequences from constantly being under stress over time as well.
※ CONSTANTLY LIVING IN SURVIVAL MODE MAKES US SICK ※
Because some people have never lived in another way and just know this kind of living, they might think that this is normal. This is life. I for sure was thinking this just a few years ago before I accepted and overcame my burnout (Episode 24). I thought that it was normal to be constantly stressed, putting myself under pressure to perform at work. Always trying to keep everything under control so nothing bad happens. I did not realize what I was doing to myself, my physical health and my mental health.
I have learned since then that this way of living your life is not normal. We are not built to live like this. Our natural way of being is enjoying life, and feeling love for everything and everyone. We want to have trust in the universe, the higher self, the higher power that is out there – whatever we want to call it.
We are meant to feel these positive elevated emotions all the time: joy, gratitude, harmony, and coherence are what we are made of. It’s the energy that we are made of. That’s why feeling these kinds of emotions is so enjoyable and feels amazing. It feels right!
※ IT’S THE MINDSET OF SURVIVAL AND SCARCITY ※
What does not feel right, is constantly living in stress, time pressure and endless to-dos. It might feel normal to you because you are so used to it and running a program, but it does not feel right or good. It’s a way of living lots of people think is what it is to be alive at this time. That we have to do it all. That we have to be perfect to be worthy of love, respect and success. That this is the only way of surviving and thriving.
It comes from a mentality of scarcity that goes hand in hand with survival. We think there is not enough for everyone, if this person has it then I cannot have it. Scarcity is so close to survival. If we believe that there is not enough for everyone then our survival is not ensured. It means we need to fight for resources, jobs, money, and for being right. It puts us into a place where we think we have to justify ourselves for everything we are doing, saying and believing.
“I AM JUST DESCRIBING HOW MOST OF US ARE LIVING THESE DAYS – BUT IT DOES PAINT A PRETTY BLEAK PICTURE, DOESN’T IT?!?”
Survival mode is the short-term, fear-based mode of thinking you enter when your fight-or-flight response is triggered. In survival mode, you spend so much time focusing on the dangers that you miss out on the opportunities. And the emotions that go along with it are survival emotions: fear, anger, aggression, despair, and powerlessness.
※ FEELINGS OF SURVIVAL ARE LOW IN ENERGY AND VIBRATION ※
These are the emotions that have the lowest vibrations of energy. That means they have the least amount of life in them. These emotions are the furthest away from what it means to live. So it’s natural and makes sense that they are called the emotions of survival. But being stuck in survival means you are not living. And we don’t even realize it. We have done it for so long now that we think this is the natural and normal way of being – but it is far from it. It’s the opposite way of how we are meant to live our life.
“WE ARE ADDICTED TO THESE SURVIVAL FEELINGS AND THE THOUGHTS THAT GO ALONG WITH THEM BECAUSE WE DON’T KNOW ANYMORE HOW ELSE TO BE.“
We trained our minds and bodies to have them and we don’t like change. Change means to go into the unknown and that means even more danger for a person that is already living in survival mode for too long.
We want to stop this vicious cycle, interrupt it, and train our body and mind to have positive thoughts and feelings again. We forgot how to have them. In this life, we might not have even experienced it. Maybe some of us remember how amazing it was to be a young child that had no worries, no care in the world, just joy, happiness, laughter and love for everything and everyone. That is how we can live our lives as well as adults.
※ YOU CAN HAVE IT ALL WITHOUT COMPETING AND BEING PERFECT ※
I know it sounds crazy to some of you and unimaginable. How could you let go of competition, of trying to be perfect and trying to achieve everything you think you need to achieve? I know this feeling. I have been there and I never would have believed someone that you can have it all without any of it and live so much happier and fulfilled.
When you are constantly in survival mode and feel stressed, there are just 3 things that you can focus on: your physical body to make sure it´s alive, your outer environment to make sure that you are safe, and time to check when you will be safe again or when you are running out of time.
By constantly focusing on these 3 factors, you have no energy to look inside of you, to become aware of how you are actually feeling and how you are doing mentally. You cannot become aware of how you are doing and what you are doing to yourself.
※ UNTIL YOU DECIDE TO CHANGE ※
Nothing will ever change until you change. Your environment is not going to change, your job is not going to get easier, and your to-do list is not going to get shorter if you don’t change first. Before I learned and understood all of this, I would change jobs quite frequently always looking for something better, more interesting, with better conditions, more interesting colleagues or a better boss. I was always on the hunt for the next best thing not realizing that this is not what I needed.
“MY BROTHER WOULD SAY: YOU ALWAYS TAKE YOURSELF WITH YOU. NOW I UNDERSTAND IT.”
Even if I change my job or company, it would just turn out to be the same as before because it was me who had to change and not my environment. You always take yourself with you. And if you don’t change, nothing will ever change in your life.
If you are interested to work with a meditation that helps you to change, check out the links in the podcast notes as I have meditations exactly for this purpose.
※ STEP INTO YOUR LIFE BY GOING INWARDS ※
You can step into awareness. Move your focus from the outside to the inside. Spent less energy controlling your outside world and trying to connect with your inside world. Check-in with yourself about how you are truly doing. If you feel like you are just going through the motions in your life, you are not living your life how you meant to do. If you feel that you just do what needs to be done to keep your life going then you are not living your life how you were meant to do it by the natural laws. You are not feeling like you are supposed to feel in your natural way of being, how your existence should show up and live this life on this earth.
※ CHECK IN WITH YOUR THOUGHTS ※
“WHAT ARE YOU THINKING ON A REGULAR BASIS? FEELINGS ARE THE LANGUAGE OF OUR BODY, THOUGHTS ARE THE LANGUAGE OF OUR MIND.”
How would you describe your regular thoughts? Are they inspirational or not? Do you feel they are more positive or rather negative? Are they hopeful or not? Do they sound loving to everyone and everything or not?
I am not talking about becoming a perfectionist in positivity – that is missing the point. It’s not a competition. You are already complete how you are today at this very moment. There is no need for you to be something else, become someone else or meet somebody else before you are complete. You are complete now.
When you are able to get to this understanding by lifting your feelings and your thoughts bit by bit, you realize it’s not about becoming a perfectionist in positivity. It’s about being. Just being and living your life, with love, joy, gratitude, with trust. It’s about embodying love. Being joyful. Being grateful. Right now. With what you have, with who you are, with what you are doing. Right now in the present moment.
At the end of this episode, I leave you with a quote from Diane Ackerman, who gave us perhaps the best affirmation for this topic:
“I DON’T WANT TO GET TO THE END OF MY LIFE AND FIND THAT I LIVED JUST THE LENGTH OF IT. I WANT TO HAVE LIVED THE WIDTH OF IT AS WELL.”
You owe it to yourself to thrive, and not just survive.
