Episode Transcript
Through my podcast, I help you to bring more energy back into your life. And the best way for us to recharge is by sleeping well and enough. I started the podcast 2 years ago with an episode about Sleep – and today at Episode 100, I will pick up the topic again and share with you what I learned and implemented myself to sleep better.
Do you struggle to fall asleep in the evening or stay asleep at night? Maybe you are someone who regularly is awake for hours in the middle of the night?
That is what I am going to cover in today’s episode. I am going to explain what happens in your brain and body when you are lying in bed wide awake and worrying that you are not able to fall asleep any time soon.
Once you are able to understand what happens, you can do something about it. And I share with you what I do when I have times that I cannot seem to fall asleep or I am awake in the middle of the night for no good reason.
※ NOT BEING ABLE TO FALL ASLEEP SUCKS ※
Because let’s be honest. It’s super annoying and frustrating. Watching the time on the alarm clock go by hour by hour and not being able to get the restful sleep we all need for the next day. It sucks!
I am most certainly not a sleep expert. I just share what I have learned about our brain and our body over the last year and why it makes sense that we are wide awake when we are in certain states of being.
A few years ago, when I still struggled with this, it would drive me crazy wasting all of that time in the night and then feeling tired for most of the next day. And that might be the same for you.
※ LEARN HOW TO SELF-REGULATE YOURSELF TO SLEEP ※
The good news is, that once you know what is happening inside of you, you can step into self-regulation and bring your mind and body back to sleep. It might need a few practice runs. But I think you would agree that it’s so worth it.
Having a good night of sleep is just the best! Feeling refreshed in the morning and ready to tackle anything that life throws at you, is priceless.
So why is it that we cannot fall asleep or stay asleep? What happens inside of us when we experience this?
※ BRAIN WAVE PATTERNS THAT KEEP US FROM FALLING ASLEEP ※
Let’s start with our brains. Our brain is constantly producing waves which we can measure for quite a while. And those brain waves are classified predominantly into alpha, beta, theta and delta brain wave patterns. At night, when you are asleep, your brain is in delta brain wave patterns. These are very slow waves. Not a lot is going on in there.
Then when we start to wake up we move from theta, to alpha and into beta brain waves. This journey usually happens quite quickly. And then we spend most of our day in different levels of beta brain wave patterns. This is when you are conscious and awake. You are actively using your brain to go about your day. You are currently listening to me in beta brain waves.
If you would meditate you move out of beta and into alpha and maybe into theta. Alpha is where we are very relaxed and we think more in pictures. And theta brain wave patterns mean we are in a suggestible or hypnotic state, very close to falling asleep.
So why is this all so important to understand? The reason is that for our body and mind to fall asleep we have to move through the brain wave states. We have to move towards delta brain waves to fall asleep. We cannot fall asleep when we are stuck in Beta brain waves.
※ SLOW YOUR BRAIN WAVES TO SLEEP ※
That means that when you are actively thinking about things, you are in the typical beta brain waves which means you are nowhere close to falling asleep.
For you to be able to fall asleep, you want to slow your brain waves down. You want to move out of that active thinking state of your brain. Does this make sense to you now?
So that’s the first reason why it makes sense biologically that we cannot fall asleep when we are still very actively thinking about things. It’s just not possible.
※ THE NERVOUS SYSTEM PART THAT KEEPS US FROM FALLING ASLEEP ※
Now the second part of our body that I want to discuss is our nervous system. You know how I love to talk about our nervous system. And you might have heard me talk before about the main 2 branches which are the sympathetic nervous system, the fight and flight nervous system, and the parasympathetic nervous system, the recover and restore nervous system.
What do you think in which part of the nervous system can we fall asleep? In the fight or flight system or the recover and restore system? I know you got the answer right. Of course, we cannot fall asleep easily if we have the fight-and-flight nervous system activated. The body has to stay awake as it perceived danger or a threat.
All of the physical processes that happen in that state prepare you to either run, hide or fight. But most certainly not fall asleep. And that means we want to regulate our nervous system and if we are stressed then we want to move out of that stress response. Only then will we be able to fall asleep quicker.
※ THE 4 STEPS TO FALL ASLEEP AND STAY ASLEEP ※
Now let’s talk about how to do this. Let me share with you what I do when I experience either beta brain waves or an activated sympathetic nervous system – but I actually want to fall asleep.
The first thing that I learned NOT to do anymore is to get frustrated or worry about not sleeping. I remember lying awake years ago wrapped up in my thoughts about something and then worrying that I don’t get enough sleep.
And that worrying supports both – my beta brain wave patterns and my fight and flight response. So that is really the first thing that you want to let go of: the frustration or worry about not being able to fall asleep.
※ DISRUPT THE SYSTEMS THAT KEEP YOU AWAKE ※
The second step is to disrupt the thought patterns that keep me in the beta brain waves. So whatever I am thinking about, I stop myself from doing it. As long as I keep mulling over those thoughts, I am not going to be able to lower my brain wave patterns towards delta brain waves.
There are many different tools that you can use to disrupt your thoughts. I personally love to move into a meditative state by either focusing on my breathing or focusing on the space around me. I know that this automatically lowers my brain waves.
And these are the same tools to be used to move from the sympathetic nervous system to the parasympathetic nervous system. So if I feel agitated, frustrated, angry, sad, or any other stress-related emotion, I want to disrupt it. Focusing on your breathing or the space around you helps wonders to move from the fight-and-flight nervous system to the recover and restore nervous system.
※ THESE 4 STEPS WORK REALLY WELL FOR ME TO FALL ASLEEP ※
And once I disrupted the cycle of the stress response emotions, I concentrate on emotions that are related to restoration and recovery and therefore sleep. That can be love, calmness, gratitude, or wholeness.
And while I am using all of those tools to lower my brain waves and activate the necessary part of my nervous system, I love to use a mantra: I am tired. I am tired. I am tired.
That works really well for me as I start to feel very sleepy and tired and shortly afterwards I am actually asleep. You can try out the same mantra or use something similar like:
- I am asleep. I am sleeping.
- I have the best night of sleep.
- I am deeply asleep and dreaming wonderfully.
※ SUMMARY ※
So to summarize the steps that I use to bring myself quickly to sleep when I struggle with it in the evening or in the middle of the night:
1. Don’t worry or get frustrated about not being able to fall asleep.
2. Disrupt the thought patterns that you are currently thinking about so you can lower your brain waves. You can focus on your breathing or on the space around you.
3. And the same tools work for you to regulate down one part of the nervous system and regulate up the one part that helps you to fall asleep. And then bring up emotions that are suitable for sleeping and a relaxed state.
4. And lastly, use a mantra while you are moving towards sleep. Once you use this again and again, it gets programmed into your subconscious mind as a signal for you to fall asleep when you think that thought.
And if you like to meditate, I created a Sleep Meditation a couple of months ago which is available to you on my YouTube channel. In that meditation, I guide you through the different stages of the brain waves. Try it out, especially at the beginning it can help you to practice lowering your brain waves.
OK, that’s all that I have for you today on the topic of falling asleep and staying asleep. Let me know if this was helpful. Connect with me via Instagram, Facebook or YouTube as I would love to hear from you. Maybe you even have already a strong sleep routine and can share with us your tools to fall asleep easily.
